depression

I am so depressed i just want to end my life right now i just cant see a way out i,m in hospital with pnemonia i send a lot of time her with my lupus i,have copd right now i just want to die i even looked at buying morphine off the net because am allergic to it and it would kill me i just cant see a way out no more i,m writing this crying and i dont cry as a rule thks for listening debbie

Hi Debbie,

I'm Chris. We are all here to help you through this difficult time. It is hard at times to see your way out especially when you are battling different diseases and hospitalized alot. Today's tears could be tomorrow's smiles. Please don't give up, we care!! How long have you've been diagnosed with lupus and COPD? What kinds of meds do you take? We will listen whenever you want to talk, vent, laugh, cry or whatever. I am so sorry for your pain. Please keep in touch with us.

i,ve had lupus 12 years know copd 6 years i,m on a lots of meds i just want to buy morphine right now because i know that would do it because i,m allergid to it i,m in consant pain cant sleep always in and out of hospital i just think my family would be better off with out me all i am is a burden to then debbie

Hi Debbie:

I just tried to send you a post and think something happened here - so, I'll try again.

Welcome to our family - I know you are going through a tough time right now but we are here for you! We are here to help you in any way we can. I can tell you that almost everyone here has felt like you at some point in time - but please don't give up - hang in there - we do care!!

Give us a chance to help you through your bad days - we can help you cry, make you smile, or just listen.

I'm so glad you have come to our forum and this group of people here are the best!! We care about each other like family. So, thanks for joining us - Just realize that what you are going through right now will pass.

By the way, I love your name Orange - how did you come to choose it? You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Debbie!!!

You listen to me and get that DAMN thought out of your head you hear me!!!!! You know, you and i have chated besides here and i know this is not what you want. And as for feeling like your a burden to your family ( BULLSHIT).
I agree that at some point we have all questioned this DAMN disease and the way it has effected our lives, thats when we have to reach inside of ourself and say PISS on the WOLF and the things that go with it and say this is not going to beat me , I'M going to WIN and enjoy LIFE!!

I know we both have LUPUS and COPD and it effects us in different ways, but we both know what HURT and PAIN is and if i could you could send me half of your load and i'll deal with it for awhile ( anything to get this WRONG THINKING out of your thoughts!!

Like the other GIRLS have said we are FAMILY and and if you think your a burden on us YOUR WRONG, we may never meet one on one but we DAMN sure care and YOU BETTER GIVE US A TRY!!!! or i'll come over to the U K and kick your ASS and that will HURT.

Well if i keep chewing on your butt your going to kick my butt, Hey thats your goal for right now get well and give me a ass kicking a cussing out Hell i don't care, JUST DON"T GIVE UP. Plus i didn't guide you hear to this home away from home , for you to give up!!!

Lot of LOVE from a family member!!! PS you can kick my ass later but i am posting you email address

hollidaydebbie@yahoo.co.uk
RAY

Hi Debbie, Sweet Debbie, Please don't do anything desperate. We have a family here that is pretty unbelievable and if you stick around a bit, you'll see that this group of people is amazing and that we are here for you. I know you are in pain Debbie but ending your life isn't the answer. Please please don't do something desperate. Talk to us. It is amazing how much we can help you. Sweet Debbie, please know how special you are. Please join our lupie family. We are here for you.

Monica

Hi, Debbie,

I think a lot of us can relate to having pain that extreme (at one time or another) and also feel like we are burdensome to our families, but I know it would hurt your family horribly...much worse... if you weren't around.

Have you ever talked to your doctors about anti-depressants? I've been on them since I was 23...way before the Lupus diagnosis and I found out that not only will they help make things more manageable emotionally, they also can help with pain relief. I asked my doctors about it and they explained that it has to do with the endorphins your brain releases.

Please be safe and know that we are right here for you and we do understand.

Hugs,
Beth

Hi Debbie,

I'm so sorry you are feeling this way. Mental Illness seems to go hand in hand with Lupus and when you get really depressed it can be a long road back! If you let us we can all help you climb out of this dark hole that you are in because we all know what you are going through, we have been there too. Suicide really isn't the answer, I have always believed it takes a coward to commit suicide (I have lost 2 relatives and many friends to suicide) because they take the easy way out and I don't think you are a coward Debbie because only the strongest people are dx'd with Lupus and it takes a strong person to live and deal with Lupus, we all know that only too well! You probably feel as though you don't have anything left to fight with but you do you just need to dig deep it is there you just can't see it at the moment. Let us support you on your journey we can help you get through this.

We care Debbie and I am sure there are others in your life that also care, so please don't do anything silly.

Take Care
Love and Hugs
xxxMaz

Hi Debbie,

Are you there? I am worried about you please talk to me. Are you still in the hospital? Please don't think your family will be better off without you - that is not true!! It will only hurt them more and forever. It really does help to talk about it. I was in the hospital back in 2005 and tried to kill myself. I unhooked a telephone cord and wrapped it around my neck. A nurse found me and here I am. I was very depressed and sick physically and just wanted to end it. Little by little I found my way back, with the help of antidepressants. I still am depressed but not as severely as before. I can deal with life better now.

Is there another doctor you can see for your pain or a pain management specialist? I can't take physical pain and I can understand you feeling the way you do.

PLEASE talk to me. My email is christines555@yahoo.com Or talk to someone here who you feel comfortable with. We want to help you and care what happens to you. Please, Debbie, please.